Camp 'o' de Random
by The Sama Sisters
Summary: Yes, it's yet another installment to the Randomness series! The title say it all X!
1. TASTE THE MOTHER FUCKING RAINBOW!

Ok, people. This is the start of Camp o' de random. Be prepared….

--

Chapter one: It all begins!

"I KNOW A SONG THAT GETS ON EVERYBODY NERVES!"

Itachi sighed, hiding his face in his hands. It was bad enough he got stuck in a seat between Sami and Nebu, but it was WORSE when they both started to sing. The whole bus soon joined in. In front, the Sound Five were annoying their fellow leader, who was DRIVING the bus.

"What's in the middle?" Tayuya sang.

"THE WHITE STUFF!"

Orochimaru sighed. Oh, this was turning out horrible already.

Sasori's situation was worse. He got stuck between Tenn and Livi, who were asking questions about him and Deidara, or singing.

"PUPPPET MAA-AAAAN!" Tenn sang.

"Have you and Deidara made out yet?" Livi asked.

"No! Shut up!" Sasori hissed.

About an hour into the bus ride, Itachi fell asleep. Sami took a pack of skittles out of her bag, opened the pack, and threw them at Itachi.

"TASTE THE FUCKING RAINBOW!"

Nebu laughed as the S-class ninja got pelted with candy.

Deidara laughed, shaking his head. "It'd be a miracle if he doesn't go insane again, un."

Sami shrugged, dumping the pack of skittles on his head. Nebu had been taping it ever since the packet of skittles was taken out.

"Mggh…?" Itachi blinked, shaking his head. A waterfall of skittles fell onto his lap. "The hell?"

"Loook!" Chibi popped up from the seat behind, "Itachi's FRUUITY!"

The bus burst out laughing, as Itachi looked around for a seatbelt to strangle himself with.

"…. Where's the seatbelts?"

"Hnn? Oh, we took 'em out," Nebu replied.

Itachi sighed, shaking the last of the skittles from his hair.

"OH YEAH, WE'RE HERE!" Sami shouted, running out with her bags.

"Eight weeks here…" Naruto sighed. "Oh, this will be fun… a lot of fun!"

After everyone got to their bunks, put their clothes away and got situated, Pein called for the first assembly.

"We're going to announce the jobs. The Jounin and Akatsuki will receive jobs, while the CIT's accompany them." He put down the stack of papers. He paused. "Itachi…. You're the lifeguard."

Silence.

"… what idiot suggested THAT?!" Naruto hissed. "We can't trust him with our lives!"

Pein ignored him and continued. "Deidara and Sasori are in charge of Arts and Crafts, obviously. Hidan… you're the basketball coach. Zetsu, you run Nature while Kisame runs boating and fishing. Kakuzu's our treasurer… and… we don't trust Tobi with a job."

"Tobi likes to work!"

"Shut up, Tobi," Sasori hissed.

The day passed as everyone got used to his or her jobs.

Apparently, a few girls had an idea to fake drown. Almost any girl would die for Itachi's CPR. Ayumi, Nebu… and some random girls did that. Itachi sat down after swim was over.

"What the hell…" He sighed. "When do seven girls drown like that in succession?"

"They must SUCK at swimming," Kisame shook his head.

Itachi slammed his head on the table. "I hate my job."

"Our first night around the campfire…" Nebu sat down, passing around ingredients for s'mores.

Tenn grinned. "Can we share stories? The one I have in mind isn't exactly a story, but it's funny!"

"Go ahead," Deidara took a bite from his s'more.

Tenn took a breath, "You all know how I'm obsessed with Kingdom Hearts now, right?"

"And, the leader of Organization 13's name in Xenmas. We put his name into an anagram thing… and…." Livi trailed off.

"ONE OF THE WORD… well, words was MANSEX!" Tenn laughed.

Everyone but Itachi (who hasn't laughed in gods know how long) laughed. Sasori tried not to, but couldn't help it.

"M-mansex?" Kabuto stared. "Damn, I feel bad for him."

"Pfft. The fucker probably finds it funny," Hidan shrugged. "But, we have to tease the bitch…"

"That's what Sasori and Deidara have!" Sami announced.

Everyone but the two mentioned (and Itachi, again) started to burst into hysterics. Nebu and Livi almost fell off their seat, trying to take a deep breath to calm down. 

"N-n-na-naaa…" Deidara was trying to find words, but nothing.

Sasori was redder then his hair. He resisted getting the urge to strangle Sami, but decided to remain sitting down.

After everyone had calmed down, it was decided everyone went to bed.

About an hour later…

"Mansex."

"Sami, go to sleep already!" 

Forward onto see chapter 2!


	2. FIIGHT!

Chapter two: FIIIGHT!

"Sami?" Garnet shook her, "You awake?"

"Mangina!" Sami sat up.

"Yep, she's awake." Chibi shook her head.

"Any reason you're waking us up?" Livi asked, yawning. "I want to sleep!"

Chibi went into her bag, taking out whipped cream and feathers. She set the items down, and then cleared her throat. "We're going to play our first prank on the guys! The classic, yet awesome whipped cream-in-face trick."

"Sweetness!" Sami clapped. "Can we hit them with pads, too?"

"…. What?" Nebu stared.

"We c—"

"Ok Sami, we get the idea." Chibi threw a pillow at her.

"On with the mission!" Tenn stood up. "Let's go!"

"How much do you bet Sasori and Deidara share a bed?" Chibi paused in thought.

"Shut up…. But they probably do," Rachel shrugged. "C'mon, let's go in. I wanna hit them with whipped cream."

The rest of girls nodded, going in. The first person they saw was Tobi, who was on the floor, fast asleep, a plushie orange. The girls stared.

"Is there a reason he's not in a bed?" Garnet asked, poking him with her foot.

"Because he's FRUUUITY!" Chibi laughed.

"Or someone kicked him off his bed," Garnet broke in. "Come on, let's just split into groups and throw whipped cream in their faces."

The girls nodded and went off.

Ayumi, Livi, and Garnet went off to Itachi's room, holding a red feather and their own can of whipped cream. Livi put the whipped cream on his hand, and Ayumi tickled him with the feather.

One… two…. SMACK. The whipped cream nailed Itachi right in the face. He sat, staring at the girls. "Get out."  
"Whhhhy?" Ayumi whined, clinging to his arm. "It was just for fun!"

"LEAVE!"

Nebu, Tenn and Chibi went off to Sasori's room. Chibi nearly used the whole can of Whipped cream, but Nebu smacked it away. "My god, save some of it!"

Chibi sighed, shaking her head as Tenn used the feather, and…. SMAACK.

Sasori shot up, shaking the whipped cream from his hair. He wiped the whipped cream off his face, and glanced at the three girls. "Get out before I kill you."

Sami was brave enough to go alone. She went to Hidan's room, put whipped cream on his hand…. And you know the rest.

"THE FUCKING HELL?! WHAT BITCH JUST DID THAT?!" Hidan hissed, glancing around. He then saw Sami staring at him.

"I WUV YOU."

Hidan twitched, getting up. "GET THE HELL OUT!"

"RUUUUN!"

Sami dashed towards the door, the other girls following. As Chibi just got near the door, she tripped.

"Go on without me! Save yourselves!"

"… ok," Sami walked out.

Nebu sighed, dragging Chibi by the arm back into the girl's bunk.

"That didn't go to well. I didn't even get a turn!" Rachel whined.

"Blame Hidan," Garnet shrugged. "He chased us out…"

"But we still did a good job!" Sami cheered. "Let's celebrate with a pad fight!"

All the girls stared. A cricket chirped in a background.

Soon, the girls were throwing said items at each other. No body knows how much sugar made them do this…. But, somehow Kisame found in necessary to enter the bunk.

"What the….?"

"Hi Popsicle man!" Sami waved, getting hit.

Kisame blinked again, but coughed. "What the hell are you doing?"

Chibi threw a pad at him, which landed in his cloak. "That. We're bored… and crap."

Kisame turned around to leave, freaked out. The whole Akatsuki was awake (thanks to Hidan) so they stared at Kisame while he entered. As he turned around to shut the door, the pad fell out his cloak.

"Kisame…" Itachi started. "What the hell is THAT?"

He stared, trying to find a half-decent explanation.

"You're sick, un." Deidara stood up, and went back to bed.

"You sicken me…"

"Pervert."

"You really ARE attracted to blood!"

Keep going! There's still Chapter 3! 


	3. I Quit!

Chapter 3:

"I quit!"

The lifegaurds glanced at Itachi who had just entered, sitting down.

"You... quit?" One spit out. "Itachi, you were doing fantastic."

"No, I wasn't. They didn't actually drown," He replied, shaking his head in disgust.

"They... wait... what?" Kisame raised an eyebrow, "Explain clearly."

"I overheard the girls earlier." Itachi looked up."

---

"Ok, who's gonna fake drown first?" Ayumi asked. "I got first last time, so..."

"Me!" Nebu raised her hand. "I wanna go."

"So," Chibi yawned, "When do you think he'll find out we faked drowned just to get CPR from him?"

"As long as we keep up a good facade, not for a while."

---

Each lifeguard stared, jaw dropped. Finally, Kisame caught his breath and spoke.

"Who's going to be our new lifegaurd, then?"

"First person who steps in the room." Itachi sat down. As soon as that was said, Deidara walked in.

"You!" A lifeguard pointed, "You're our new lifeguard."

"... say what?"

---

"Did you hear?" 

"Hm?"

"That blonde cutie... Deidara, I think. He's our new lifeguard!"

Nebu nearly spit her water out, staring. All the girls at the bench dropped thier waterbottles in shock.

And then...

"HELL YES!"

Soon after that, the CIT jobs were being offered. Everyone took thier slips, filled out the jobs and were assinged to thier area after lunch.

"Aaah, lunch!" Livi clapped. "I'm hungry. I wonder what the food will be like."

"Good, I hope." Mandi shrugged. "But, oh well. Let's eat!"

Nebu and Kabuto grabbed thier plates, and went up to get thier food. On Nebu's way back, she nearly dropped her tray. In shock, horror, and was ready to have a laugh attack. Orochimaru. Hairnet. Apron. And even better, holding a ladle.

Kabuto almost choked on his spit, and nearly burst out laughing. "What th... the... hell?"

"Laugh and I'll kill you." Orochimaru hissed.

"Did... you..." Nebu glanced back, and burst out laughing.

The rest of the Akatsuki had seen it, too. And Sasori got a HUGE kick out of it. Itachi just stood there in shock. If possible, he would of burst out laughing. But that would be out of character.

"Wow," Kakuzu blinked. "It surprises me how he even considered wearing that."

Chibi nodded. "It's perfect blackmail, though."

"And," Naruto snorted, "Sasuke's our janitor. Now THAT'S perfect!"

Everyone nodded and continued to eat.

---

"YES!" The girls squealed. "Swim time! Finally!"

Itachi sighed, knowing they'd pull the same trick on Deidara. Poor, poor Deidara... well, that's what Itachi thought.

'Time to put the plan in action,' Each girl thought, grinning.

Oh, how this was gonna be fun!

As the girls came out in skimpy bakinis, they sat far from Deidara so he wouldn't hear their plans.

"Ho...ly..." Deidara stared. "They like me a LOT, un!"

Sasori stared, speechless.

"Ok, who's going first?" Rachel asked.

An onslaught of "MEMEME!" and "Like hell, bitch! I'm going first!"

The only way to decide? Of course. Rock, paper, sisscors. It left Sami and Nebu on a one-on-one.

"Rock..."

"Paper..."

"Sisscors..."

"SHOOT!"

"Hah!" Sami struck a pose. "I'm going first!"

"Shut up," Tenn whispered. "Don't let him hear you!"

Garnet nodded, grinning. She suddenly began to like the outdoors a lot more.

A good thirty minutes later, Sami, Nebu, Tenn, Livi and Garnet had gotten CPR from Deidara. Sasori was twitching violently, and began making a kill list.

"I think you're going a tad bit too far," Kisame sat near him, "Killing the poor girls? Come on; you're more reasonable then that."

"Shut up or this pencil's going through your eye."

"..."

---

Nightfall eventally came. And, it was the night everyone waited for. Karoke night.

"We're doing duets," Pein cleared his throat, "And Nebu, Chibi and Sami already sorted everything out. You're allowed to choose songs, but some songs were... nessecary for them to sing."

Nebu shot a smirk at Sasori and Deidara.

"Let's began, shall we?"

That's it you guys! Wait till next week! Then we'll have chapter 4 up!


End file.
